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Hey Writers,

In honor of the first edition of the Atomic Writer Files, I decided I would do the exact opposite of atomic writing and write my longest newsletter yet.

My first book "Under Budget" will be released on my 31st birthday, April 28th! In honor of that approaching date, here are 30 life lessons I wish I knew at 20.

Cheers,

Brock "Era" Thompson

30 Life Lessons I Wish I Knew At 20

I’ll be 31 in less than a month.

In that time, I’ve made leaps and bounds in my life.

I won my battle against alcoholism.

I lost 130 pounds.

I started a business, almost burned it to the ground, and rebuilt it into something I’m proud of.

Here are 30 life lessons that I would teach my 20-year-old self.

1. Act Like The Person You Want To Be.

I resent the statement “this is just who I am.”

It’s an excuse to stay comfortable and to avoid growth.

When I was a drunk, I told myself, “I just like to drink to relax.”

When I was 330 pounds, I said things like “My body just won’t let me lose weight.”

When I was terrified of talking to women, I said things like “Girls just don’t like me.”

The truth? You become who you practice being.

Want to be confident? Practice confidence.

Want to be fit? Practice healthy habits.

Want to be a successful entrepreneur? Act like a CEO for a million-dollar company.

The best version of yourself isn’t who you are—it’s who you strive to be.

2. You Control Only Your Attitude and Actions - Nothing Else

“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react.” - Charles R. Swindoll

You have a finite amount of daily energy, so be careful where you spend it.

I used to drain my battery on things like:

• Wondering why clients ghosted me
• Worrying about tomorrow’s problems
• Dwelling on past mistakes

Today I choose to spend my energy on what I can control:

• The things I can do to get me one step closer to my goals.
• The quality of my work
• How I treat others

When something goes wrong, I ask myself: “Can I do anything about this?” If the answer is no, which is usually the case, I let it go and save my energy for something else.

The results? More energy, better outcomes, and more happiness.

3. Appreciate The Process.

Everyone has goals.

Some want to be entrepreneurs, others want to become the CEO, and as writers, most of us want to grow a large following so we can monetize and go full-time.

But here’s the truth: most people quit because they don’t immediately see results.

Those who reach the top are the ones who didn’t quit.

Learn to appreciate the process. Find joy and fulfillment in seeing your own improvement. Celebrate your daily wins and don’t measure your self-worth through vanity metrics.

4. Read Books To Improve, Not To Entertain

I used to hate non-fiction.

I felt like self-help books were a scam that were meant to make people feel good about themselves.

I was wrong.

These 5 books changed my life, and I’ll let you in on a secret: I didn’t finish half of them. Once I find the big idea, I immediately practice it in my life. I’m reading these books to improve my life, not to fantasize over what life could be.

1. Your Head Is A Houseboat
2. The Laws of Creativity
3. Unf*ck Yourself
4. What The Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast.
5. Extreme Ownership.

5. Your Brain Will Only Remember What You Choose

We consume more information in a day than our ancestors did in a month.

Tweets, books, YouTube videos, tasks at our job—it all stacks up until our brain feels like an overflowing inbox.

All of that information has to go somewhere, but there isn’t enough room in your head for all of it. We forget more than we will ever know.

The solution? Create a second brain.

1. Keep a note on your phone for quick ideas.
2. Use Readwise to save important quotes for later.
3. Use a physical journal for daily reflection.

Your brain is for processing information, not for saving it.

6. Be A Skeptic

Never take information at face value.

I’ve watched hundreds of hours of videos about “how to grow on social media.” Yes, there are proven systems, but you have to modify those systems to work for you.

I’ve been posting 2-3 times a day on X and Threads for the last 60 days, but I realized that I’m not great at writing 280 characters.

What did I do? I moved over to LinkedIn two weeks ago. The 3,000 character limit matches my style. In those two weeks, I’ve already garnered almost 10,000 impressions and gone from 0 followers to 44.

Find what works for you. Don’t let other people tell you what should feel right.

7. Writing Teaches You To Think

Writing isn’t just about putting words on paper—it’s about organizing the chaos in your head.

I started journaling when I got sober. I’ve done my best to do it every morning and every night since.

Journaling made me realize how cluttered my head was.

It forced me to:

• Sort through my emotions
• Challenge my assumptions
• Find patterns in my behavior
• Question my decisions

Now, whenever I face a difficult situation, I write about it. The solution often appears on the page before I even finish writing.

8. You Are Defined By Your Actions, Not The Outcomes

You have no control over the result.

The only thing you can do is show up and do the work.

You can post 100 tweets before you see more than 5 likes on a post.

You can go on 100 Tinder dates before you find someone who is worth seeing more than once.

Things won’t always go the way you want, but that’s ok, at least you tried.

Showing up is a victory.

9. Systemize Your Life And You’ll See Results

I used to fly by the seat of my pants.

I would show up to my shop every day with no plan.

I would sit down to write with no ideas, expecting them to just come to me.

Good things happened very rarely.

By systemizing my life, things become effortless.

Here’s my writing system:

1. I spent at least 30 minutes looking for ideas every evening.
2. I pick one idea before I go to bed and spend 30 minutes brainstorming.
3. I sit down at the same time every morning, ready to go.
4. It takes me less than 5 minutes to get started, and I’m able to post an essay, two tweets, and one LinkedIn post every day.
5. I write my newsletter on Saturday, record videos on Sundays, and I restart the process every Monday.

The results?

I never miss my self-imposed deadlines.

I see steady growth on every social media platform every week (especially on LinkedIn).

My content is 10x better than when I was winging it.

10. Perfection Is The Enemy Of Finished

I’ll use writing as an example.

I’ve wanted to be a professional writer since I was very young. I’ve attempted to write books and written countless articles that are now in the graveyard.

I’ve had success as a ghostwriter, but I’ve struggled to stay consistent when making my own content.

Why? Because nothing was ever “good enough.”

I would constantly struggle with writer’s block because I wanted every sentence to be perfect before moving on to the next.

Now, I’ve realized that the only thing I can do perfectly is keep going.

I write from the heart; I don’t write for the Grammarly score.

Just get started.

Post something every day.

Practice in public.

Improve by 1% every day.

By the time you start building momentum, everyone will think you were a pro from the beginning.

11. Booze Sets You Back

I drank every day from the ages of 17 to 24.

I thought I was just in my party phase. I was wrong. Alcoholism destroyed my life. I almost burned my business to the ground, I lost relationships, friends, family, and most importantly, my self-respect.

This was the darkest time in my life.

Heavy drinking is normalized in our society. I think back to all of the nights I chose alcohol over everything. If I had stayed away from booze, I’d be a millionaire.

I’m not blaming booze for my setbacks—I take full responsibility for my actions and decisions. But I know this: if I’d never tasted alcohol I would be much further ahead.

12. Learn To Use Your Time Wisely

99% of us have day jobs.

Starting a business seems impossible when you’re working a 9-5. “I don’t have enough time” is one of the most popular excuses.

That’s not true.

You have plenty of time, you just don’t know how to use it effectively.

One hour before work. One hour after work.

That’s it. Two sacred hours every day.

You’ll accomplish more in one year than most people will in their entire life.

13. If You Want Better Relationships, Fix Your Relationship With Yourself

When I was at my lowest, I attracted toxic relationships.

When I was insecure, I attracted people who took advantage of me.

Only after I learned to respect myself did I start attracting the people who respected me.

But self-respect is just the start. This also means that we have to not only attract the right people, but you need to actively seek out those who have the life you want, and let go of those who hold you back.

If you want to start a successful business, find people who already have. There will be people in your life who don’t understand. People in your current circle might try to hold you back because of that.

The right people will lift you up, the wrong people will find their way out.

14. The Opinions Of Others Are Not Your Business

There are plenty of people who don’t like me.

I used to obsess over winning the approval of everyone around me. That was unhealthy and distracted me from chasing my goals.

You can’t please everyone. There will always be negative people. Some want to see you fail.

Focus on what feels right to you. Their opinions aren’t your business.

15. You Don’t Have To Love Everything You Do

I love 80% of my work.

I love writing, I love editing videos, and showing up to my shop every day to interact with my community.

I don’t love cold outreach, even though as a small creator that’s how you find clients.

I don’t love talking to the camera, even though I know video is the best way to build an audience.

I love being self-employed and doing work that aligns with my passion, but I hate doing taxes.

The 20% of your work you don’t enjoy is some of the most important work you’ll do. Focus on the big picture to get through those tough hours. That 20% is what fuels the other 80%.

As Ali Abdaal says: “What would this look like if it were fun?”

16. Hard Work Will Always Beat Natural Talent.

Michael Jordan failed his high-school basketball tryouts.

He turned failure into fuel. He put in his 10,000 hours. Now he’s the greatest to ever play the game and is credited for putting the NBA on national TV.

Everyone’s bad when they start. You have to learn to dribble before you can dunk.

Put in the reps. Keep practicing. You’ll become a pro.

17. Don’t Feel Bad About Making Money Off Of Your Passion

I used to feel bad charging full price for my ghostwriting service.

“I’m not worth that,” sat in the back of my mind for a long time.

I let potential clients haggle me on price. The result? I attracted clients who only cared about price and didn’t value the quality of my work. I would spend dozens of hours doing endless revisions and was constantly told I didn’t know how to do my job. They wanted free work, not quality work. This prevented me from filling my calendar with clients and made it difficult to pay my bills.

Then I started saying no to less than full-price. Everything changed. My calendar quickly became filled with clients who cared about quality, not cost.

Which leads me to my next point.

18. The Lowest Paying Clients Will Always Be The Most Work

Never lowball yourself just to get clients.

When I started my brick-and-mortar, I tried to beat all of my competitors on price. What I quickly realized is that we attracted customers who still wanted to nickel and dime us.

Our product selection is superior.

Our customer service has garnered 245 5-star reviews.

We raised our prices and started seeing better results. This is because we stopped trying to cater to every person and started focusing on the customers who were going to spend the most money.

We’re now sitting at $500,000 ARR in a town with less than 5,000 people. We may lose one customer a week over price, but we have over 1,000 repeat customers per month.

The best customers don’t care about price, they care about the quality of your work.

19. Never Let The Fear Of Striking Out Keep You From Playing The Game

One of Babe Ruth’s most famous quotes.

I come from a family of MLB players. Because of this, I love baseball, even though I was pretty bad. During middle school summer league, I got hit by more pitches than I can count, but every time it was my turn at bat, I stepped into the batter’s box.

Fear is one of the most powerful forces in the world. It prevents us from starting businesses, talking to someone who could be our potential spouse, or applying for our dream jobs even if we’re underqualified on paper.

When fear tries to take control, tell it to go away. You might strike out, but you can’t 400 yard home runs if you don’t step up to the plate.

20. Never Compare Your Insides To Someone Else’s Outsides

Instagram shows us the highlight reels.

We see 20-year-olds driving Ferraris.

What you’ll never see is the rental bills, the debt, or the loneliness.

Comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel is a recipe for inadequacy.

21. Spend As Little As You Can On The Small Things

I fell into crippling credit card debt at a very young age. I wanted shiny things and didn’t consider the long-term consequences of my actions. When I started my business, I realized I had to change my spending habits.

I stopped buying steaks and started eating ramen.

I stopped buying the latest tech and started using phones until they broke.

I didn’t buy a new car until the wheels were falling off my old one.

Short-term sacrifice leads to long-term opportunities.

Know your priorities.

Skip small luxuries.

Invest in growth.

22. The Grass Isn’t Always Greener On The Other Side - It’s Greener Where You Water It.

My previous business taught me this lesson the hard way.

The majority owner and I didn’t get along. We argued non-stop. I felt underappreciated, and I stopped putting in effort. Instead of having a simple conversation to find a solution, I invested in a competing business that promised me a majority stake.

I thought I’d found my escape. But, when I look back on that 6-month period of my life, I realize it wasn’t about doing what was best for me, it was about my ego. The new business quickly sank—same problems, different address. I ended up reconciling with my old partner and going back.

I learned that voicing my frustrations and accepting criticism was the solution all along. Things got better and our business soared until we were both ready to move on to the next chapter.

If you find yourself in a frustrating situation, don’t immediately chase the “next best thing.” Sometimes, the best thing you can do is water the grass you’re standing on.

23. Great Relationships Require Constant Effort

I used to think good relationships were easy—that if you found the “right” person, everything would just work out.

That mindset ruined every relationship I had.

Great relationships are like gardens. They need:

• Daily attention and care
• Regular maintenance
• Protection from weeds (toxic behavior)
• The right environment to grow
• Patience through different seasons.

This doesn’t just apply to romantic relationships, this applies to every interpersonal relationship you build.

When my business partnership was struggling, I thought finding a new partner would solve everything.

When friendships got difficult, I’d let them fade instead of having tough conversations.

Now I know better, even though I’m still learning. Through hard lessons, I’ve learned that great relationships require:

• The ability to have tough conversations
• A willingness to improve yourself
• Proper boundaries
• Patience

The effort never stops, but that’s what makes these relationships worth having.

24. True Friends Tell You What You Don’t Want To Hear

Honesty can hurt, but that pain often leads to growth.

When I was in active addiction, my real friends didn’t laugh it off—they told me I needed help and refused to co-sign my poor behavior.

When my business was failing, true friends didn’t say “you’ll figure it out”—they pointed out specific problems I needed to fix.

When I was making excuses about my weight and poor diet, my friends didn’t enable me—they challenged my victim mentality.

It’s better to have honest people who aren’t afraid to hurt your feelings than those who enable your poor behavior to keep you happy.

The friends who truly care about you will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear.

25. Mean What You Say, But Don’t Be Mean When You Say It

Every time I faced a conflict in my life, I’ve struggled to handle it properly.

Sometimes I’m too harsh, burning bridges I could have strengthened.

Sometimes I’m too passive, letting others walk all over my boundaries.

Sometimes I just ignore the problem, hoping it will disappear.

The truth is, conflict is part of being human. What’s important is how you handle it.

• Be kind but firm.
• Be honest with tact.
• Be patient with limits.

I’ve learned that the strongest message isn’t always the loudest. The key is to be clear and stand your ground without being cruel.

26. Bedtime Routines Are Underrated

Everyone talks about their perfect morning routines, but rarely do I hear anyone talk about what to do before bed.

My routine is simple.

• Read a book.
• Write in my journal.
• Pick my idea for what I will write the next morning.
• Phone on nightstand, not in bed.

When I follow this routine, I go to bed at peace. My sleep is sound and I always wake up feeling motivated to get started.

Your bed should be a place for rest, not for restlessness.

27. Your Parents Were Probably Right

All of us went through the stage of life when we thought our parents didn’t understand.

Now that I’m older, I realize that most of the advice my father gave me was correct. He wasn’t trying to control me—he was trying to teach me how to avoid the same mistakes he made when he was young.

Sure, we sometimes disagree. But I’ve learned that even when his advice wasn’t perfect, he always had my best interest at heart.

Parents aren’t perfect, they’re people, but most of them are trying their best to help you live a better life than they had.

28. Turn Every Setback Into The Setup For Your Comeback

Life is full of setbacks, and what separates the winners from the losers is choosing to bounce back.

If you’re trying to grow as a writer, sometimes people will unsubscribe from your newsletter or unfollow you on X.

Sometimes you get injured at the gym and you’re tempted to eat a pint of ice cream every night while you heal.

You might have a sudden drop in revenue in your business and go into panic mode waiting on the rest of the sky to fall.

When bad things happen, you have two options:

1. Let the setback define you.
2. Let it refine you.

Every failure is a lesson. Every rejection is redirection. Every setback is preparation for something better—but only if you choose to see it that way.

29. Make Time For Yourself

Hustle culture tells you the only way to get ahead is to outwork everyone.

There’s something to be said for hard work, but there’s more to be said for smart work. If you hustle for too long, you’ll burnout and quit. You’ll also build a resentment towards life.

Do something that’s totally unproductive once in a while. Intentional leisure is important.

“They” say that video games are a waste of time, that giving up gaming for an extra 2 hours for work is necessary. I’m calling their bluff. Video games keep me sane.

I love playing Pokemon ROM hacks every night after spending 8AM to 7PM on my business.

Leisure is the reward for a hard day’s work.

30. You Have A Part In Every Negative Situation In Your Life

It’s easy to blame circumstances and other people.

I’m still guilty of this. When things go wrong, my first instinct is to point fingers:

• “The client was impossible to work with.”
• “They didn’t know how to communicate.”
• “The market is terrible.”

There are plenty of reasons to get mad—people are always going to be people—but my life gets better when I ask myself better questions.

• “What red flags did I ignore?”
• “How could I have communicated better?”
• “What could I have done differently?”
• “What can I learn from this?”

This isn’t to beat yourself up and it’s not to dwell on the past. It’s about recognizing your power to change situations by changing yourself.